Written by Brenna Flynn, WLLC 2015-2016
I’ve always been quite fond of children. This quarter, the Wellness LLC class went to a presentation about motherhood and child loss. Needless to say, the presentation along with the blog post that went along with it terrified me. I want to have children, and although I’m young, I’m thinking about the future. The future comes with thoughts of marriage bearing children. As I read through the blog post titled “Welcoming the Rain(bow)” I felt a great deal of sympathy towards the mother, but also feared getting pregnant at any point in time because of the possibility of miscarriage or infantile loss.
The author states that the grieving process for her son Milo was a long one, and “preparing to give birth [again] was quite the task emotionally.” I’m someone who finds loss extremely difficult to deal with. Personally, if I lost a child in my first pregnancy, I would never want to conceive again. In a certain way, it would ruin everything I am trying to establish in my life. I’m currently getting my degree so I can get a good job in order to help support a family. Not being able to have a family because of childhood loss would sadden me in the ultimate way because my overarching life goal is to have a family and care for my children.
To me, the pain of losing a child would be something that would absolutely destroy me. As Maria Brann states, “the communication surrounding the loss, or impending loss, of a child can effect the psychological and physical well-being of those involved” (21). This is absolutely true for most people. I know I would fall into a state of depression, anger, and hatred towards the world.
I thought this author was extremely brave in sharing her story because I know I would react much differently if put in the same situation. Also, what she did after losing her child was quite astounding. She is now trying to help women who have also experienced child loss. Given the same opportunity, I would not be able to do so. Hearing the stories of children that could have been would bring me back to thoughts of my own child who could have lived. Overall, this presentation truly made me think about how I would handle myself in certain circumstances. It made me think that certain people can handle traumatic experiences quite differently than I would, and that these people have something special within them that allows them to push through any sort of pain they may be harboring within them.